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At first, I thought, how will we survive in this tiny home during lockdown? I cannot go out for work, and with that, what about my income? Another thing is that I have a son with special needs. He also has to go to a school for kids who are the same as him. And my son, well, let’s just say he needs constant prompting. I was shook of that fact, but now, I can say for sure that I have survived it. My son and I have survived at home and under lockdown without having to go out in public.

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The discussion in the 2017 autism convention still lingers in me. It is not that I do not agree with what the experts say about autism in the event. But I find it a little bit off because it seems like the emphasis of pity is what takes a toll on me. I don’t have anything against that because I know my child needs compassion. However, I was expecting a different approach.

Yes, my autistic child can no longer do things as normal people do. He cannot talk and express his feelings directly. My child will forever have a hard time understanding even the smallest task anyone gives him. He can never expect things to go his way. He will always act impulsively and will get irritated when something triggers. I do understand all of those. But being a mother, I want things to be different for my child.

I know I cannot do more with his condition. But I don’t want him to think that he’s different. Because I realized that the more I give him special treatment, the more my child doesn’t want to be better. Why not let him be? Why can’t we let autistic children feel they are normal individuals too. Will it be that hard to compromise?

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Yes, it is not going to be easy because they need guidance. But wouldn’t it be nice if we allow people with autism to live their lives according to what they can and what they want? My child is autistic, but he has feelings. He knows when people are trying to be kind only to prove a point – that he is incapable. Yes, it is not often the case. But how can we better explain it to people with autism if we only look at them as mentally incapable individuals?

Just think about it.

Love does move in mysterious ways, and when it hits you, it does hit you hard. However, in choosing your romantic partner for life, you cannot fully know who they truly are not until you get to live under one roof. However, what if your partner is someone who has Asperger Syndrome?  

 

“The term unconditional love does not mean love without limits or bounds. It means, “I offer you my love freely without condition.” What this means is that when we offer our love, we offer it without expectation of repayment.” – Elizabeth Earnshaw, LMFT

 

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Any marriage will not always be smooth sailing. Marriage will always involve hard work, love, respect, and perseverance to withstand the test of time. Challenges faced by married couples may be harder when one is with Asperger’s Syndrome.

Sarah Swenson, MA, LMHC, wrote in her blog, “If you are in a relationship with someone with AS and you are experiencing distress as a result, there are things you can do to ease the relationship. There are ways you can grow together in support of one another. AS does not go away, but you can learn behaviors and methods of interaction that increase the odds that you will reach mutual understanding on various aspects of your life together.”

 

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Various literature has always focused on what average people look for in a relationship. There are books, TV shows, and magazines on how to look for the perfect mate.  

On the other hand, there is little known information on what people with autism look for in a relationship. People with autism spectrum disorders are still capable of romantic love, though it can get more challenging for them because of their condition. 

“But it’s important to remember that Aspies do love. They just love in a different way. Just as all marriages face challenges, there are things that can be done to help this relationship.” – Kathy J. Marshack, Ph.D.

 

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Every couple dreams of having a little angel of their own. They have imagined how they would be like parenting a baby. Some are too excited they even prepared a nursery in the house right before they are pregnant. It is because having to create a new life out of love is the most fantastic feeling in the world, to see a little human walking and running around the house who has the parents’ eyes and lips. It is indeed priceless! 

 

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Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) has many subtypes. You can identify the subtype of ADHD based on the predominant symptoms shown by a person. It can either be attention-deficit, hyperactivity-impulsivity, or a combination of the symptoms. Remember that not only children can be affected by ADHD, but teenagers and adults as well. Read More →